Being a business owner is great! I get to work all day/night, risk my life savings on a hope that people will patronize my business… but what's the best is getting a chance to dodge stupid messages fired from NPCs. Now, I get it. Not everybody knows everything about Prodigy so simple questions are always welcome. I include many of these commonly asked questions to the FAQ page for easy review. But sometimes, I get messages from people that are pure gems and I hate to be selfish by hoarding them all to myself so let’s go through just some recent ones, shall we?
Today, I see a message stating simply “Why the fuck are my mom and my brother taking me to this place of DEATH!?” I can only assume that this person is afraid for their life if they’re forced to come here. A place of “DEATH” is not a place meant for survival like a gym or church; it’s a place where you… umm, die like hospice or like your mouth when eating a hot pocket right out of the microwave. I can confirm to this person that nobody has died here, or at least physicality-wise. I’ve seen pride die from people attempting and failing on the minigolf course so that is something of death. I’ve known a few deaths occurring from Super Mario Bros, but he comes back; I promise. I think I speak for all my customers by saying that maybe you shouldn’t come if you’re irrationally fearing your life. Let’s move on.
This finely crafted email comes from a subject line and no body so you know I take these very important messages very seriously. This person is so bothered by my age rule, that they write in some sort of shorthand 20th century hieroglyphics and that they can’t even wait until the body section to let loose. I get it. It’s a long hike. You gotta hit TAB and shit to get to the next field. But, this person clearly doesn’t want an age limit… at my own business. This person wants me to run my room as this person sees fit. I just wish they left their phone number so I can call them immediately when I plan to open a new business. I want to run everything by them to make sure it’s okay before proceeding. Oh well, I guess I’ll have to work alone on future projects. But really... check back a few blog posts and review my revenue report for 2023. Got 'em!
Bottom line, if you have something to say, stop by and talk to me face-to-face. My name is Jeff and I'm the one with the big smile. Let’s actually have a conversation if you’re so against what I’m doing. I'm open to any discussion. Or just relax and simply move on. Prodigy isn’t for everybody. I don’t advertise so I don’t actually tell people to come here. You find out about this place on your own. You choose to come here… unless your mom drags you along. Geez, what a horrible time; playing games with the person who gave you life or playing some serious games as adults without toddlers running around. Get over yourselves.
Obviously this is a sarcastic post. Laugh a little; even though the messages are real. I love my job and being a business owner. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.